Oh God xD Like ever I have so many ideias in my mind and I don't know how to start or what I'm gonna talk about...
- Hm... first of all this picture represents me about 80%... I've ever been suffering in silence and still do it...even when I was a little child...It's from me... lot of things disturbing me and I get quiet holding everything until I can't stand anymore and in the middle of the night I cry a lot with all that things killing me inside... and ever I try to "open" me to someone I think I can trust... humpf >.<>
- Because of it I trust not trusting, of course I have friends who I have a great percentage of trust, and they know a lot about me and my life...well they think they know a lot but what I speak isn't even 10% of me... I can affirm it...wherever...
- Let's come back to the main point: my problem to trust... when is about friendship I don't have problems I've learnt when I can and cannot trust on the person, I've had 5 problematics friendships and learnt a lot with each one... but relationship...this definitely doesn't work... maybe because of it I'm totally pure... I give respect to myself! My school taught me that, buuut someone come to me and say "I love you", or "you're so beautiful and sexy!" I don't believe and won't believe even when friends come to me saying this !
- I suffered sooooooo much with these things during my adolescent... the boys loved humiliate me, or try to do bad jokes... my luck that how I give respect to myself, I didn't go at first and ever found out what they were doing... They've not maden more bad things that they've already done... exactly for it I don't believed, I've never been kissed and I'm virgin.
- I don't have any shy to be like this but I don't even consider it like " excuse me! I'm better than you!", for me it's something normal that each one have your right time, and unfortunately I always say: "if one day someone fall in love for me will need have patience, try to show me in some way that it's true his feeling and that I can trust on what his telling/speaking/saying to me"...I will try to scape, to not talk about that subject, or fight against me putting in my head that I'm not loving too...kind of self protection...
- Well, how nowadays guys want to meet, kiss and fuck my hope gone COMPLETELY! I'm concerned that I'll be single for more many years, to not say for the rest of my life! I'm not being negative or depressive... I'm being realistic...
- I need to meet, live together a little bit to know the person and trust... people don't want this nowadays...sooo...
- hmpf... let's call it a day? Good Night to everyone
- Ps.: Live together not like live, live! In the same house and so on...what i mean is to hum...became a friend first, see the person about 1 month or 2; Don't need to be every day but most of the days... to really know him ^^
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